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For Christmas EveThree years have passed
And memories starts to fade
But one memory is still strapped to my mind
The one night of Christmas Eve
I remembered you holding my hand
Squeezing and bouncing around the room
You made me warm and smile
Laugh and cheer
We were standing in front of the tree
Your hand locked with mine
You were shaking with delight
Santa is coming
You whispered to me
A smile crept across my face
A door was opened
The sound of feet approaching
You squeezed my hand tighter and tighter
As a shadow formed by the door
And the form were dressed in red and white
With a long and white beard
And glasses on
You cried out
And leaped toward him casting your arms around him
In a big and tight embrace
Just as tight as that squeeze you gave my hand
Santa was laughing
And you were smiling
I could only smile from were I stood
Because I knew who was under the "hood"
Our smiling father who had raised us
And praised us
Santa gave you presents and presents
My guardian angelAs you lock the door and cast away the key
I had found my corner of darkness
All the times I have been locked up inside a cage
I already know how it feels to be traped like a bird
The feeling of being something that doesnt deserve to live
But I do know why I am locked up in the first place
The very reason that keeps me here
The darkness inside me
The very reason that holds me back
When you are looking at me I understand what you think
You are disgusted
You hate the thought of me being alive
Thats why you keep me here
So that I wont hurt anyone
But you cant hold me here forever
One day I will get out of here
But not because of my dark power
No, it will be another power
Someone much powerful than me
Someone who wont look at me with disgust
Someone who wont run away
No, A guardian angel will save me
My Guardian Angel
The only one who can show me the true reason of my powers
The only one who can control my anger
The light in my darknessIn me there is only darkness
In every corner of my body lies darkness
Growing everytime I am angry or sad
My tears is full of hate
My words are poison
My eyes are filled with anger
But how I wished it would end
People fears me
They are afraid I will break them
Take their life away
But I am misunderstood
All I want is beeing healed from this blasted curse
They are running away from me
Fleeing from the darkness
Keeping their lifes
But they cant escape
The curse has already taken them
Making them fall to the ground like flies
What must I do?
In my corner of darkness I am thinking
When She is approaching
Her, the one with light
The one who isnt afraid
She is like me except for some differences
Her tears are full of passion
Her words are caring
Her eyes are filled with love
She is blessed with the healing light
She is looking at me with her loving eyes
I admire her courage but why is she here?
She must not touch me or the darkness will take her sweet life
She dont care?
A stolen kissThe rain fell down from the sky like it usually did in the city of the mountains.
People walking slowly through the streets, holding the umbrella high so no rain could make them wet or their paperwork they were helding tight to their chest.
But there was one who didnt have an umbrella or walked slowly through the streets of the big city. No, she ran through the city, wet and cold. She stopped and looked up at the red flags around the streets, the red banners hanging from buildning to buildning, it made her smile. Her favourite football team had finally won the gold in the league after 44 years since last time they won. She opened her bag and dragged out her new scarf, it was red and white and there was written Brann with golden letters. With a warm smile she pulled it out of the bag and put it around her neck and began to run toward the bus station.
The doors swung open and she looked after the flower shop and there she was standing. She ran over to her mother and the
Your sweet smileTake my hand
Let me help you
Dont let go
I will be here with you
Not only now
My simple words isnt enough to save a life
These words is just simple words
Only words that cant save anyone
Even that I hoped they would
I hoped they would save you
You, my sweet sister
I hoped you would let me in
But you let me out
You said you were fine
But I knew you lied to me
Why did you lie?
I was there
I could help you
I gave you my word
But you and your sweet smile fooled me
I am going to miss your sweet laughter
Our father is trying to hold his tears but is always failing
Your friends has lost their best friend
And I hold my words
The simple words I gave you
That day in the rain
When you held my hand and smiled
When I cry People take me for beeing so strong.
They say I can handle everything.
They say I have no weakness.
But even I have a weakness.
They don't know me.
Thats the problem.
They take one look at me and begin to talk about how I looks, how I tackle my day.
But what do they know?
They don't know what happens when I cry.
When I cry, stars falls from the sky.
When I cry, people falls into darkness.
When I cry, the world is going down.
Thats my weakness.
When I cry I am always alone.
People must not know this terrible faith.
I can't let them share this pain.
Cause when I cry, the world is tearing apart. <i>
Falling downWhen I was hoping for a better day, it went the wrong way
If I only listen to what you said, maybe it would go the right way
How could I be so stupid to fail again?
Why do I fail at all?
Is there a sign out there for me to call?
I am losing strength when I am talking, I cant help but fall behind.
Is there a reason why I fall so deep?
Am I turning weak?
I am losing my ground
How can it be?
I have always been so strong.
Where is my soul?
I am falling down.
Why do you keep saying I can do this?
I have lost hope of winning, I can never become what I want to be.
Stop saying those words, it wont work on me.
I will lose no matter what you say
I am losing strength for every step I take.
I know now this is a failing desire.
I cant win cause I am falling down.
Falling down into nothingness .
Pain of loveWhat is this feeling I am feeling?
Its very delicate but it hurts alittle.
Its like my heart is burning or turning to ice.
My breathing is turning heavy.
My throat is dry, I can`t say any words.
Am I turning into something?
What can I do against this?
First I thought it was anger but I realized it doesn`t hurt like this.
My eyes is filled with tears and I don`t know why.
My head is going to burst.
What is this strange feeling?
No medicine can heal this.
No doctor can find out what this is.
Its not a disease, its not deadly, but it feels that way.
Why does this hurt so much?
Its not a wound and I am not bleeding, so why does this cause pain?
Tell me why I feel this way.
What is this and why does it hurt but still feel good?
Is there any good with this?
How can this be good at all?
Know I understand this, but it still hurts.
This is the pain of love.
This is the pain of love i feel for you.
The reason it hurts is we are apart.
The reason its good is we are in love.
I wish this love never
Match of deathHold your sword in hand
It can end now
But he is not dead yet
His eyes burns with revenge
He wants to hurt you
His armor is full of blood from people before you
Before the match we was together
You hold my hand and smiled
"Everything is going to be fine" you said
I knew you would say it but I knew it was impossible to protect you from this strong opponent.
I faked a smile to make you feel better
"I know you will win" I said
You gave me a hug before you left
I wish I could stop you
I wish this could end
Don`t make me cry
I can`t let you die
He is stronger than you
He made you fell
His sword right through you
You screaming in pain
I can`t look
Your pain is just too much
When he walkes away
I run up to you
Kneeling beside you
I can`t believe this
Why did I not stop you?
I knew you couldn`t win
I guess you hug stopped me
"Why so sad?" you asked
I tryed to smile but I burst into tears
Your heart became weaker
Your breath colder
I couldn`t let you leave me now
"I love you.
The Boy Who Wouldnt EatIf you can flutter
I have failed you,
for you were not forged
to be so insubstantial as that
You were writ
to be an epic fable
of endings ignored,
of outlasting your body
through the sheer will
of a writers starving heart
through a broken, bowed
but bravely abiding body
that fights the soul
to comprehend Beauty.
................written in a frenzy and run-on
and exclamation points
used in rapid succession
words all blurred
so bare bones it's bloody
strung out and on display
in a frightening combination
of paragraphs and stanzas
punctuation gone mad
ellipses my new black
used and abused
then spit out
in gratuitous repetition
there is no word count here
no hearts dotting the i's
just a string of letters
done up in cursive
but not very pretty at all
To Be ThinYour eyelashes fall
on tablecloth cheekbones;
fine, white linen,
to an unsustainable point.
Your tears spill
and stain the cloth,
of grey, of grey,
spoiling that unattainable dream.
BeautyI'd rather wear flowers in my hair,
forming a delicate chain
Than diamonds around my neck,
covering my tender blue veins
For with every precious petal
and every lucent leaf
I'm a living lesson
teaching beauty can not be bought
But rather it grows and flourishes
with every living thought
you're just a question marki met you so long ago
but back then our bodies were made of metal
and nowadays they’re made of the blades of
grass and dirt settling
underneath my fingernails.
my fingers are having a hard time
reaching the keys and
my organs are shaking mostly because i haven’t
eaten in two days but also
because i’m worried about the things you're doing to yourself.
we didn’t meet very long ago at all but it feels like forever ago
and you say you don’t know me
that you don’t know anyone
but baby you're turning into a skeleton and i’m peeling back my skin
to try and reach my bones, just like you.
i hope you're happy,
i’m covering the hard wood floors now
the bits and pieces splattered.
they are calling it a suicide but i’m calling it
a way to see my brain and
just how dark it has become, and honestly
i don’t want you to try and see about your’s.
i’m mourning the loss of my heart and wish you weren’t either -
Fearing MeI'm not afraid to cry
and I do it
a lot more than you would guess.
It isn't always sadness,
I just feel like I need to,
feel everything so strongly
that it's the only way
to let go for a moment
because if I hold on for too long,
if my grip gets too tight
I'll break myself,
I will break you like glass
and we will both
I am a good guy
who hasn't yet found a way
to show it,
I am a good guy
who still identifies with the villains,
hides everything important
anything to throw you
off of my trail....
and I don't know why,
but I am trying.
Maybe I think
that if you could see me,
the real me,
you wouldn't want to look anymore,
want to be anywhere near me,
and the idea
that I can't add up
to be enough for you,
to be enough for me,
is so fucking heart breaking
I can hardly fathom it.
I can't say that it doesn't hurt
because it does,
it hurts a whole hell of a lot,
I've come to depend on pain,
to befriend misery
Sound PoemIthrumden, ithrumden delsum
nith mul thruss elmrissull.
Eth rut mundelliss
Curmiette dessel renrin
irme trell ithrumden.
The partyFlashing lights
Smoke all around
About to pass out
My head starts to hurt
I can't take this anymore
So without saying anything
I find the exit
And escape that place
"How can someone have fun in there?"
Coming HomeComing down the ramp I spotted you in the crowd
Your tenderloin skin always stands out
Your aura was particularly bright that day
Whirling dervish colors in the pale sun
You wore a chauffeurs cap and held a sign that said “Anyone”
I knew that I wasn’t anyone, so I walked away
“Strange days,” someone said, and I agreed
I hate crowds and old garbled memories
Arriving home, my wife and cat didn’t recognize me
I looked in the mirror and noticed that I was someone else
Still carrying my old baggage, I turned away
I should have taken your limo
No more runawayI used to hide in the shadows
Looking at the rest scratching their heads in confusion
Facing their problems.
I used to turn my back when the trouble stood at my doorstep
Waiting patiently for my move
Waiting for me doing something wrong.
I liked to wave my problems as they passed by
I loved see the misery in my classmates faces when they got their grades
Their jaws dropped to the floor.
While I used to run away from all tests and problems
I got time to think
But there was always someone who was there
Taking notes of how I acted.
They told me I was a coward
They said I was a runaway
That I wasnt brave enough to face my problems
But I ignored them.
But I knew sooner or later I had to face it
That I could no longer be a runaway
Run away from my problems
Run away from my future
If I even had one.
I have taken my choice
I have to face it know
I can no longer hide myself in the shadows
I must face the light of my future
I can no longer be the coward they said I was
LatreuophobiaI wash off sick-sweet orange lipstick in front of a mirror as dusty as gothic romances. It tastes like oblivion, that is to say, like nothing my tongue can detect.
The door opens with a creak no private restroom could emulate. Some chick with blue bobbed hair and smeared eyeliner. I looked like that once. Ten years ago.
Getting the beer out of my hair is harder. Some men just can't take it when I'd rather they not kiss my feet or call me an angel or-
“Dayum girl, you look like a goddess.”
I gulp, taste of acid.
Vanguard, Chapter 1: DuncanDuncan's Journal: Day 1288
I consider myself a good man. I respect women, elders, my equals, and the dead. I say a morning prayer, and an evening one. Hell, I even thank the gods for a meal, instead of immediately chowing down in the voracious manner as the other soldiers here do. By all logical means, I should be in paradise. No really, not just because I'm a good man, but also because I should be dead by now. So I ask myself: why, oh gods up there, have I ended up in hell?
1288 days. 1288 days of my life have been spent in this misery, and I'm beginning to lose faith in the glory I was promised. Some of the rookies still live in their ignorant bliss, but I've lived long enough to realize that there's not much glory to find here. “Sing the songs of glory and march into battle—-join The Crusade today!”. Such were the words of the posters The Crusade has spread all over The Mortal Realm. Gullible fools practically stand in line for these songs of glory that th
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